The families of our children all require thorough and continued guidance and assistance. They have never experienced conditions where regularity, punctuality, or reliability were demanded from them. Even in respect of their children's food as a basic need they take surprisingly little responsibility. Consequently they would never engage themselves in supervising the children's homework. Visits to any relative or friend - especially for attending marriages or visiting sick relatives - are of much higher importance than a regular school attendance. For these reasons it is not only necessary to work on the children, but also on their parents. The success of our efforts rests on both.

We usually call the parents to four to five meetings in a year. Though the participation is optional, they have to attest their presence by signature in order to show their interest in the children's education and progress. Meanwhile we reached a participation of almost 100% and even the children's fathers are attending the meetings increasingly. Often we make these meetings attractive with the performance of a dance or drama by the children, or we also serve a warm meal to everyone.

The main aim of these meetings is to make them realize their part of the responsibility towards their children. This is done in a very humorous and entertaining way. Most of the parents have adopted the attitude "Shishu Mandir will attend to all matters", and indeed this is what happens most of the time. But there is no escape from their very own responsibilities, as no school can promote a child who is not attending school regularly. For this reason each meeting invariably has the topic of 'Responsibility'. Sometimes discussions arise, so far mainly from the fathers, and also critical questions. One father asked why we are sending a child home as a punishment, though we know that during the day both parents are at work and nobody is there to take care of the child. The argument is undoubtedly logical, but such a rough and startling push is occasionally necessary to awaking the parents from their ever lasting lethargy.

One of the main burdens of the families are the huge debts, which accumulate during the years, for one, due to the criminally low payment of their work, and for the other, due to the indiscriminate spending on drinks of the fathers, who usually are heavily addicted to alcohol. The dependency on alcohol is so strong that they do not only spend their own daily wages, but also demand part of the wife's hard earned money. In order to maintain the children to some extent, debts are taken up against enormous rates of interest, which they cannot ever pay back. What has resulted is a vicious circle, which makes them fully dependent on others.

To meet this our school has started a savings scheme for the parents in the name of the child. The amounts which are to be paid every month, are fixed in the bank for a minimum of 5 years, but can be extended up to the end of the child's education at our school. So at the end of the school career a sizeable amount should accumulate which can be used for the child's further education, marriage or setting up of an own shop.

Other topics like hygiene, AIDS, health insurance, healthy nourishment etc. are regularly discussed with the parents by our social workers.

Though the success rate among the parents is low, we remain optimistic. It is also rewarding to observe small breakthroughs, when for instance a father leaves his habit of drinking or a mother establishes a small income generating business. A real change can, however, only be expected from our children for whom we spare no effort or care.

Hella Mundhra
December 2010